We were recently at a music festival in The USA where we happened to talk to Stacy Johnson one of the thousands of “uniquely” dressed women who had adorned her body in bindis.
“I just love India, you know. It’s like, such a forward thinking country. I totes love yoga and Hinduism. It’s so tolerant. So obviously, the best way for me to show my love for my spiritual homeland is by needlessly appropriating it’s culture.”
Stacy, who is a vegan says she became even more obsessed with India after she discovered that the whole Indian government was dedicated to preservation of cows. “It’s just a step in the right direction you know.” She said. “I even heard that once, a politician took his own sandals off and offered them to a poor flight attendant in need of footwear. What a beautiful gesture from such a tolerant government! I’m sure he has a beautiful aura.”
“I’ve never been to India myself, I’ve heard it’s a bit smelly and a bit yucky but I love the Namaste spirit that every Indian person embodies. I myself tend to greet everyone with a Namaste ever since that one time I dropped acid at burning man. I read on a yoga blog that in Indian, Namaste means, ‘Let’s be one and vibe with the universe together’ and that totally resonates with me. It’s even in my Instagram bio.”
Stacy’s boyfriend says he fell in love with her the first time he saw a picture of her on Instagram in downward dog pose on a beach. “I know the beach is the most inconvenient place to practice yoga but I could just see from her pictures that this girl had the perfectly aligned chakras and I’ve been in love with her ever since.”
Stacy says she will continue wearing bindis while tripping on acid for as long as she can but also plans on taking it one step further in the future and start dressing in a full sari at future festivals. “I know it’s going to be a bit inconvenient using a festival toilet while I’m wearing a sari but this is who I really am. Oh, by the way, do these chakras make me look fat?” She asked us as she wandered off chanting an inaudible mantra.